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It’s not my usual progression post but I feel like writing random stuff (aka sharing). SG forum is too open, so I will post it here and you may be unlucky enough to see it.
Past two days were (from my point of view) like a small miracle, as I:
- went out to shop 3 times
- asked for help in shop
- sat down, picked and ordered something over the internet
- cleaned and sorted my SSD / HDD, backed up all my data so it’s all ready to do long postponed format
- picked up driving school where I will try to get driving license
- Witcher 3 summary is almost done
- didn’t have bad thoughts for whole 2 days
It may sound trivial, but in past 2 days I did more than I achieved in previous 3 months. It’s especially good, as I resigned from PhD some time ago and all I was doing for 2 months was sitting in my room. And forcing myself to get up in the morning and eat something. I know it won’t last and that I will be back in my vegetative state tomorrow or in a few days. But it was nice to actually be able to do something :D
And I hope I will drive better than this dude:
Thats great!
You are making great progress and hope you know that.
make sure to remember to use both hands while turning
I failed my first time cause ~10 bad turns in one direction and ~10 bad turns in the other direction all because I was doing it with one hand...don't be like me
Usually one tries to beat the game before attempting the challenge scenarios. Sounds like you did it backwards. :)
Thanks :D
And at least you tried to pass your exam while looking fabulous
I’m afraid mostly of parking, as everytime I see someone is parking I think “omg, why you start to turn so late, you’re not gonna make it!”. But turns out they park without problems and I always feel stupid xD
parking is really not that bad usually.
you can get by most of the time without any trouble-I have the utmost confidince that you won’t find it that hard.
Butttt. To pass the test you need to know all sorts of other stuff about parking like which way to angle your wheels on a hill or how to parallel park and it gets alot worse than in everyday driving.
Thank you for the update, Mskotor. It’s always nice to see people post good/happy things. :D
It sounds like a very productive couple of days. I’m glad there was something gaming-related in there, too. :)
Love that GIF!
Thanks!
And I find example of India (or other countries like that) kinda terryfying, as people there drive like they want, in what direction they want, and it looks really chaotic. I would surely have problems with it, when I’d drive straight and someone on motorcycle decide to turn in unexpected direction.
And I find example of India (or other countries like that) kinda terryfying, as people there drive like they want, in what direction they want, and it looks really chaotic.
Sounds like driving in my country. XD
The chaos isn’t that bad, but the traffic is terrible.
I have terrible problems with attention, so most of the time I can focus on one thing at a time. Like not hitting something that is in front of me. If I’d have to watch out constantly on my back and sides… well that wouldn’t end up well xD
Yeah, going outside can be tough sometimes (not being sarcastic at all). And interacting with people (instead of squares of prettily-arranged lights on a screen) is also sometimes just… not all that enticing? But still can be valuable. I’m sorry to hear you’ve resigned from the PhD, but hopefully you can turn the time saved into something more satisfying instead. If not, no worries – getting out of the house is pretty darn good too! :)
I’m really proud of you, mskotor. Major life changes (like resigning from your phd program) can have huge effects, and sometimes you get to be in a space where it’s a huge, mountain-moving challenge to do even ONE of the things you said, and you did all of them! Over two days! That’s a lot!
Recovery isn’t linear, and even if/when you fall back into the clutches of your fugue state, remember that you accomplished this. When part of you says ‘I can’t’ to something you have to do, you have actual factual evidence right here of ‘actually, yes, I can. It’s really hard but I am capable of doing xxxxx.’
When it comes to driving: even, deep breathing! Your goal is to be as relaxed and aware as you can be whenever you’re behind the wheel. I struggled with driving when I was younger, and I can tell you that just experience and time behind the wheel makes all the difference. Learning muscle memory, getting used to the ‘outer body’ of the car as an extension of your actual body, being able to judge distance/speed of other cars when making turns - it’s all just experience. Err on the side of caution until then and even if you get beeped at, fuck ‘em, you’ll be safer!
^_^
Since last year we have new traffic regulations, fresh drivers have to drive 10 km/h slower than actual limit for first 6 months. Like in build-up area they can’t drive faster than 40 km/h. So yeah, I expect a lot of beeping, as drivers most of the time drive way above limits, not to mention bumping on someone who drives only 40. Heh. 2 bad for them, I always follow rules, so I won’t drive faster just because they want to drive 60 or 70. Joke on them.
I talked with friend some time ago (she has driving license for many years) and she was so pissed that she had to drive behind student in practice car, as they drove at 30 km/h. And I told her that it’s their right to drive slow and safely, no reason to being angry. She didn’t like that xD
That’s great, you should be proud of yourself. :) I know it can be easy to get overwhelmed, doing little things definitely help to make yourself feel accomplished (though what you did sure sounds like a lot to me). Hope you can continue to have some good days, even if it’s just some little happy moments among everything. Good luck with driving school, wishing you all the best!
Thanks bunch! :D
Tbh I felt overwhelmed by fact that I need to beat Witcher 3, as it’s really long game (no kidding). So every time I tried to do something apart from playing in it, I felt that I need to beat it (part of my gaming OCD). So I couldn’t really focus on anything. But when W3 is beaten in 100% (and rest of gaming backlog is pretty much non-existent \o/) I feel like I can do more than usual.
And thanks for wishes! I hope you won’t read news on BBC or smth that “gamer girl killed bunch of innocent people while driving a car, as she was thinking about quests she needs to beat in Fallout 5”. It’d be awkward xD
p.s. random driving tips: Try not to worry too much about the cars behind you; be aware of them, but don’t actually worry about them. Place large trash bins to carefully feel out where the boundaries of your car are; you can usually get much closer to things than you think (helps with parking). Sight along the bottom of your left rear view side mirror to find a good approximation of where to stop on a line; it varies for everyone and every car, but it’s a convenient “shortcut” way to ensure you stop before you end up over the line in an intersection’s cross walk.
Thanks for tips :D
And thankfully instructors in practice cars have their own set of car pedals, so I won’t be able to kill anyone while trying to get a hang of car real dimensions, safe distances and so on :D
About PhD - it was nice, as I was able to learn techniques I didn’t use while getting my master degree (in cell biology). But atmosphere in that place wasn’t really good and I had serious stress problems thanks to that. So dumping PhD wasn’t entirely bad thing, at least I can sleep normally in the night again \o/
That sounds pretty awesome too me. I kinda avoid going too much out the house and especially shopping! hide So yeah, I think that is pretty great progress you did there. AND even asking for help! You did very good! hug
And having no bad thoughts? How did you do that? O.O
Wish you all the best for your drivers license. In case you do end up like that dude: blame your driver instructor! ;)
Have a great time!
Happy backlog killing :)
Thanks :D
Dunno, sun was shining, it was warm outside and I focused on doing stuff. And realised on Tuesday evening that I didn’t have any weird thoughts. Spaghetti monster decided that I should have nice days from time to time ; D
I can always show police officer this gif and say that I admire this dude and look for inspiration in his driving skills. There is always slim change it will work, right? D:
That’s super great! happy The almighty spaghetti monster worked it’s magic! :)
Er… yeah… I’m not so sure about that one tbh :] :D